This is an experience that can hardly be put into words—Is our English language even capable of expressing the full emotions felt on a pilgrimage? This I am not sure of, but I am going to try. This trip was fully orchestrated and blessed in every way by God. His hands were working even before I knew what was happening.
Essay Credit - Sarah Haddock
Photo Credit - Russell Haddock
Well somehow God decided the time was right for this journey in my life. About a week later an email arrived from the church asking for volunteers for a mission trip to Cuba; I knew this was the open door and I would discuss it with Russell that evening on the phone as he was out of town. About an hour later I received that same email forwarded by my oldest daughter stating that she would be asking us if she could go if it was a month later and she was out of school. This was the first Russell had seen of the email from our church, so he then forwarded it to me “Want to Go?” Of course, I jumped on the opportunity knowing this was the sign from God that this was the time. We put in our applications to go as a couple that evening without any plan of how we would execute all of the items we needed to tend to at home with our kids, jobs, my previous health questions yet to be fully answered. I truly felt that if we were meant to go then all would fall into place and maybe all I needed was that push from Russell. It had been an emotional and trying 2017 and I knew the way to cope and move forward in life was to focus on those open doors God places in your life. This was just that to us and within a few weeks we found out that we had been selected to be one of six team members headed to Cuba in just 6 short weeks.
First off, I am going to tell you a little back story. Russell and I were sitting in church on Sunday in February and we were asked to pray for our Hattian Mission team that had just left on their trip. Russell leaned over and whispered, “Would you ever do something like that?” I immediately responded (a little too loudly I might add) “In a heartbeat!” This has always been something that has called out to me but I have always put it on hold because the timing never seemed right and the excuses kept coming—the kids were too little, the kids had to many activities and I did not want to miss them, the kids are teenagers, we need to scope out colleges, what about Russell’s career, can he handle it all while I’m gone, can we go together and leave the girls, what would friends and family think if I went to another country and no one could contact me for a week, what if something happened, what if I was needed.
On April 10th we loaded up 17 bags/ boxes of items needed in Cuba along with our clothing and toiletries and headed out to Cuba. Checking 17, 50-pound bags for 6 people at the airport is quite a feat and one not taken without a lot of patience from all of us and the wonderful agent. As I said before God’s hands were directing everything and all bags made it through Miami and arrived Cuba. I wish I had a photo of all our carts going thru customs, but I was a little stressed being held back with my limited Spanish and all the fluent speakers headed out the other side. Once again, we were directed on without any inspection from the supervisor.
We slid out the doors to be greeted by our Hostess from our partner church in Union de Reyes, Liz, and our amazing bus driver, Ariel. Arriving in Havana was a thrill and heat and humidity could not suppress our excitement about the week to come. Driving thru Havana was about like driving thru any other big city in a foreign country—although I did notice very minimal street signs. The other big thing is many of the cars are right out of the 1950’s! Think of yourself being put into the set on the movie Greece. It is something else to think of all these cars, that are far older than I am, still running and driving the roads in Cuba. The Cuban people are amazing mechanics and figure out a way to make things work. They do not just trash it when it breaks, they fix it or reuse parts and recycle everything. It seems that so many items are repurposed—even a boot falling apart can be a planter.
Our first morning we awoke to the hustle and bustle of Luyano a neighborhood in Havana with a very active Presbyterian Church and got to indulge on fresh guava juice and papayas. Touring Old Havana was wonderful and seeing history surrounding you from the cars driving around to the colorful buildings surrounding squares filled with children playing and people chatting to old churches and art work. It was an experience to remember but nothing like what was yet to come on our trip.
In the late afternoon with the sun blazing down and our tummies full we loaded back onto our suitcase filled bus to our next stop Matanzas and the Cuban Theological Seminary where our mission coworkers, Josy Saez and David Cortés live and work. We traveled about 2 hours across the Cuban countryside and coastline to reach our destination. One thing about Cuba is that there is very limited air conditioning, so windows rolled down is the only way to go. Ponytail hair is the only option after you try to brush out your wind tattered hair—this I learned quickly.
Upon arriving at the Seminary and getting settled we began to explore the grounds and gardens and met Josy and David. The views from the hill of the seminary into the bay are incredible and I’d love to be able to grow fruits and vegetables in their terraced garden.
We enjoyed a typical Cuban dinner of roasted pork, black beans and rice and gathered to meet a few of the Seminary students and hear of their paths to Seminary and struggles to fulfill their calling with limited recourses. These individuals are truly gifts from the Lord and their spirit is contagious. They are energized by the congregations they get to reach out to on the weekends and then return to classwork on the weekdays. Their outreach is visible and clearly it enriches them as well. Their sacrifice to find transportation to churches and missions in the region while packing clean water, food and clothing is unfathomable. One of the students has to take along her twin 7-year-old boys for the weekend to a mission about an hour drive away with all of their supplies for the weekend while her husband, also a seminary student, heads the other direction to serve in another church. Transportation in Cuba is unreliable, sometimes you can get a bus, sometimes you get a dump truck with benches in the back, other times you hitchhike to get where you need to go. There is no set amount of cost for any of this as it is supply and demand atmosphere. It is just not something we consider in the United States even when taking on a calling from God. Yet with all their trials (as we see them—for them it is just typical daily life) their spirit is rejuvenating, invigorating and transformative. I know that in a week’s time I get to go back to my air-conditioned house with toilet seats and flushable toilet paper, a car to drive whenever and wherever I want or need to go, most any food item I desire at the grocery store and the list goes on, yet to see and live amongst those whose spirit can transform my soul is a gift that can never be returned. I have learned that yes, I to complain too much, about too many trivial things, about things that do not really matter in the “big” picture and that maybe just maybe if I stop and really think about the things that can change my SOUL that I too can be a gift to others.
Our next stop was to the area of our partner churches and missions Union de Reyes, Sabanilla and Cidra. We arrived just in time to teach an elderly group, called Smiles of Hope, how to play BINGO. They caught on to the different ways of play and were a very lively group. I enjoyed this very much even though my communication skills were limited. Their spirit was uplifting and joyful as they danced when they won the game of bingo and received a treat. It was fun to see exuberance and zest for life in these individuals who I am sure have seen many trials over their years. The afternoon was spent at a slave rebellion museum at the site of one of the first slave rebellions in Cuba which was organized by a slave woman. Even though our translation of what we were actually seeing was rough, there was enough emotion felt thru the massive statues projecting the oppression of slaves in Cuba that one could get a feeling of the magnitude of the plight of slaves in Cuba. This is similar to that of our own dark history in the United States. It was an interesting place that I hope I can spend a little time researching all the meaning of this museum but the symbolism behind the statues needs no translation.
That evening we were treated to a program to view the community outreach of the church in Union de Reyes. We were able to hear from a woman with an amazing voice sing a national song of Cuba and a couple dance the national dance of Cuba. We played several games and really fell in love with the Cuban people. Their spirit, joy and pride are felt with every way we connected without language. It’s amazing what a smile and a twinkle in the eye can translate to another person.
The following morning, we set out to relax and enjoy the beach and swimming in the Caribbean Sea. One of our mission co-workers, Josy, joined us for the day and assisted with any translations and provided immense background on many things pertaining to Cuba. The beaches were beautiful as expected and the water was inviting but the real treats for the day were yet to come.
We spent our lunch at a Presbyterian Church in Cardenas and met the Pastor Alison Infante Zamora. He showed us around the church and then filled us in on the background and stresses of churches in Cuba over the past 50 years. He also spoke about how he is able to make a difference in his community and grow his congregation as well as support the church. His energy, passion and spirit are what should guide us all and I hope that I take this passion and pass it along to others.
Sic 'em Bears :-)
The ceilings were really low....
Meeting with individuals from the church in Sebinilla was our evening activity and it was a true delight. This church is very small but lively and thriving. We all rejoiced in our passion for the Christian life and celebrated their 16th anniversary with games and other interactions. There were a few individuals present that warmed my heart. First off there was this little elderly lady, Mercedes, with a spirit so large it could be seen for miles. She reminded me of my very own grandmother—lively as she can be at 89 years old and she has a boldness that is lovable because it comes from Christ. Second a middle-aged man and his wife, who turned out to be our taxi driver and a former pastor, gave us plenty of insight into the daily struggles of the Cuban people and the things that have changed for them over the past 7 years. Third, there was a woman called Tamara who spoke boldly about Cuba and the changes she wanted to see going forward. She wanted more access to technology within homes and businesses among other changes. We did share what we now see as a huge negative to some technologies.
I believe we are less in tune with our family and friends as we seem to always want to check something on our phone or it distracts us from one another. Second, we have a craving for immediacy. We want it now, we want the answer now, we don’t want to wait. Sometime waiting is just what God orders and it can be seen time and time again in the Bible so why should that be any different for us. One thing I gathered from this conversation as it really hit home for me because I was seeing the issue in my very own home was that we need a break from technology, we need time to converse-- to listen and be heard, time to connect with those we love and cherish and time to play without the interruption of a text, email or another alert that causes us to lose focus on the current experience, or to stress about a situation, or just check out of the current play. We need time without distraction to engage with our loved ones and all the others we are called to love. The shift in our group was amazing and we all cherished and lived in the moment without that digital distraction. It was a blessing in so many ways and I plan to implement digital free times in my house where we play, talk and engage with one another and maybe just maybe this will pass one step further and my girls will check in with their friends in a non-digital manor more often.
The following day was our time with children in the congregations and my highlight was bringing out a simple bubble wand to get a child to engage with me. This boy was clinging to his mother and not speaking to me and my limited and mispronounced Spanish and seeing his eyes light up at the pop of his first bubble and then learning to make bubbles for himself with a simple blow was another transformative moment for me. The light in the eyes and the joy in the laughter of a child who is playing with bubbles for the first time is food for my soul. I am sure that at one time as I was teaching my own children this very same thing happened, yet they belonged with me and knew me. This sweet little boy was one I may never encounter again yet he touched me in a way I cannot explain and makes me yearn to go back and cherish those moments so long ago with my babies. Maybe I would view things differently if I had these moments before kids but then again, I can hold these memories close to my heart and allow the new memories to change me going forward. It is so easy to get wrapped up into a busy day filled with chores and tasks to knock off a list that you forget the simple pleasure in life such as laughter and play.
Our last full day was on a Sunday and we were able to gather in worship at both our partner Churches. I love the life seen in the songs that were sung even though I may not have understood every word. I loved celebrating our connection through Jesus Christ that makes us brothers and sisters united under the same God. I was beaming with pride that my husband was able to serve me communion as an elder in the Presbyterian Church while sitting in a pew in a small church in a rural village in Cuba. God brings us all together with our struggles and trials at His table to celebrate the one thing that can never be taken from us-- our salvation.
Our trip home brought some sadness of leaving too soon, of not being able to do more, of leaving the spirit of people unbroken and fully alive ready and willing to go out in any and all circumstances to pass along God’s message to all of his children. It also brought back the feeling of needing to check in on our phones—was everyone ok—what did I miss -- and clean out all the emails, texts ect. Yet, I once again saw God’s hands at work in the ability of Russell to avoid this trap—and we all know how addicted he is to his electronics. He never turned on his phone until the next day at work time. He leaves it at home when we are together, so it is not a distraction. If someone really needs us (as in our kids) then they will call me. We also saw it in making our connecting flight in Miami with exactly 54 minutes to make it thru customs, recheck our bags, get through security and run the quarter mile to our gate. Somehow-- no scratch that --I know how—all 6 of us made it to our flight even with enough time for a quick bathroom break and all 6 bags made it to DFW. I told you in the beginning that this trip had God’s hands in it every step of the way and true to the word every time we thought, oh no, within the next moment the issue was fixed. Transportation was always solved without major issues, food was found around town to feed extras, even the amazing plantains and "Muy Rico" flan.
In my experience the Presbyterian community in Cuba celebrate life joyfully, fully engaged in the moment. They are generous and full of hospitality. They do not complain about their circumstances, struggles and oppression. For them it is a way of life and they roll with it. They have a spirit that is contagious. There is a zest to pursue their relationship with Jesus Christ and this seems pure and untainted by the modern pressure of materialism.
We may have left 11 bags of supplies in Cuba and came home with half-filled bags, but I know truly what I came home with will forever have changed me and it has so much more value than what was left behind. Through this trip I am more aware that God is using people I meet and experiences I have gone through to strengthen the character of Christ within me. I desire to share the fruits of the Spirit. I want my love to abound to all those I meet and to pass along joy and peace to those as well. To always be kind, good, gentle and faithful and truly have patience. Many times, I ask why me, why this, why now and I try to direct my path based on my plan and not on the plan God has for me. I am learning to live in the moment and look to God for strength and guidance in my struggles and to wait with patience for Him to direct my ways. For I know He has a plan for me, plans for me to prosper and not to harm, but to give me hope and a future. I also know how very blessed I am and how thankful I am for so very many things --not in a material way but in a spiritual way—that I can change and seek God in all things as ultimately the only thing I can control is me and my actions. If my actions are pure and true and orchestrated by God, then why do I care about how another views me.
As I reflect back on my experiences a few things hit hard and fast—first off, we all need a break from technology and its interruptions. I want to bring this into my house more often. I want to find times to turn it all off and just engage and absorb the moment. I also want to look for trips my family can go on that supply this for an extended time. Second, I relearned that God is in control. He has this thing call life all worked out and if we listen for his call he will guide us. It may not always be perfect but there is a lot to learn from trials and struggles. Thirdly, I can now look back at times when things were not perfect and still find joy and goodness and peace in the small things. If you are open to God’s path for you there is always something to be thankful for. The list could go on but lastly, I state that I want my life to be a reflection of the Spirit and Love of Christ and not to get caught up in the anxiety and fear of what is to come for His path is laid before me to follow, I just have to listen and watch and have my heart open for all the signs.
My desire to return to continue a relationship with the Cuban Presbyterians is enormous as I have so much more to learn about the plans God has in store for me. It was a time of great reflection, uninterrupted with technology and other things calling out for my attention. I was able to fully engage in the moment and share that with my husband to transform our lives going forward. I now use those moments to, which have turned to memories, to remind me of what truly matters in this world.
Gracias a Dios
Thanks be to God